Grounded: gravel, gauze, and self-deprecation...

Excited that the grandparents were going to watch the children overnight, C and I quickly planned a ride together.  Though they are the greatest joy of my life, the kids are also so young that they can also be an impediment to riding.  Someone's got to watch them, of course.  But, it is going to pass, and all too quickly, so I will never complain that they need me.

I wanted to try a maintained trail of some kind so I could get the hang of the shifting on the new bike.  My husband had sold his cx bike when we moved back down to civilization but a quick tire swap on one of his road bikes and he was trail-ready.

Ready to roll

They say you never forget how to ride a bike and that's sort-of true, but it had been seven years since my last ride and it did feel a bit strange, if euphoric.

I had a huge smile on my face after the small, muddy descent and the few branches I rode over though I was later jokingly admonished for doing so with no patch kit on board.  Ha.  Oh, well.  I felt like a kid again, exactly what I wanted in the first place.

Bellatrix in her natural habitat

I was getting the hang of the shifting on this new bike and even enjoying the surroundings.  C pulled up beside me and then it all gets a bit squirrelly.  I've still got no idea how or why it happened, but down I went.  I do remember the fall in slow-motion, like all good tumbles.

Trixie was fine.  That's the first thing we checked.  I knew I was banged-up but okay.  We washed off the blood and some of the sand with water from the water bottles and kept going.  "It doesn't even hurt," I noted, somewhat surprised.

Haha, oops...

A mile down the road I stopped.  We were at a road-crossing and I realized it was going to be a long haul from there on out.  I was still bleeding and the adrenaline was wearing off making it obvious that I had actually hurt my shoulder and should probably ice that.  We bagged the ride and headed back.  I was disappointed (understatement).

Of course it was worth it.  I only sprained my shoulder and I the road rash healed pretty quickly.  I have mad nursing skills from my husband's old spills.  I have a very physical job and I spent the week doing my eight-hour shifts one-handed.  That was probably the worst of it right there.

Cool sling

I'd like to regale you with tales of all my subsequent cx adventures, but I am still working weeknights (when the local group rides go off) and my husband is in serious training for a pretty big goal so he hits the roads for hours and hours at a time.  I'm super impressed by his determination.

So if anyone wants to take an enthusiastic newb out on the trails, I promise to be smiling the whole time and to always laugh at my own foolishness.  I mean, that's kind of me in a bizarro nutshell: equal parts stubborn grit, childlike enthusiasm, and extra hearty servings of self-deprecation.  I don't know any other way to be.  Let's play!!

How to know what you don't know: Am I truly meant to be a cyclocross diva?

I'm a trail runner.  It doesn't matter that I haven't run in over a year, does it?  I'm a self-identified awesome athlete with no particularly convincing evidence to back this up.  Ice climber?  Yes, that's me!  Oh, well I haven't actually gotten around to it.  But I've joined all the forums and I have my equipment carefully researched and selected.  And I even get updates on sales, you know, for when I have the time and money.

Mostly time.

My husband, the Irish Italian (you're welcome, dear), is an AVID cyclist.  He is usually in training for something.  He always has big plans and tends to follow through.  (Show-off...)  To him, 100 miles in a day is actually possible.  It's the equivalent of taking the stairs instead of the elevator.  It's upping your incline on the treadmill (I'd call it a dreadmill, but I kinda like them.  I'm weird).  It's like no sugar all week.  Another thing he manages with great success.  While some people look at his data and feel sympathetically winded and vaguely nauseated, HE is looking at the people who do more, and who do it faster.  He has mad goals.

Since he has always been one with the bicycle, you'd think I would have been swept away in a sea of spandex ages ago.  Togetherness and all that.  Well, I did have a road bike for a hot minute.  I was super excited.  Okay, it was poorly-fitted and the brakes were only 70 percent effective, but it was me who quit.  I could have persevered.  I could have found a different bike.  I took that disappointment and put all that energy right into avoidance.  Maybe I'm meant to run...

While I pretended to be completely over cycling, I would still think about it.  Did I want to go for long, unforgiving hauls like my bonkers spouse?  Meh.  Did I want to launch my body all the way down steep twisty-turny sneaky-rooted mountain trails?  Not on a bike. You know, bones breaking and all that.  Besides, that's what my feet are for!  You know how the joke goes that the mom in the house is the only one that still has to keep going when she is sick?  Well, I have three itty-bitty ones.  I'm not dragging broken bones up and down three flights of stairs in pursuit of exercise and thrills.  Plus, work would like me functional.  But...I still want this thrill.  I'm almost 40 but don't tell me the thrill is gone.  I won't have it!

Enter cyclocross.  Really.  Like I want to enter cyclocross events.  It's perfect.  The fun of charging toward deliberate obstacles smacks of the reckless joys of my childhood when I was never without my bike.  Let's devise wild and wicked courses to test our bravery!  Yes, let's!  Let's push ourselves to the point of giddy, well-earned exhaustion.  Let's race towards the mud like mad geniuses of physics.  Wait--people still do this?  I'll admit to being nervous about running, er--riding, with a field of fitter, fearless wonders, but I'm game.  So how do I get started?

That's exactly what I asked superbrain and wildly weird cyclocross maven (and complete enabler) Jen Murphy.  (You must go read her blog, but not before you finish mine, because I eked it out while sick and kids were shouting at me for more gummie snacks)  Per usual, I've joined forums and peeked at gear and prices.  But I want more.  I need the dirty details.  How much is it going to cost to feed my soul?  So here we go...

I need a bike.  How much should I have set aside for a decent starter bike?  What type of frame?  Any components I'll want to change out sooner rather than later?  I'm also between sizes--my problem with bike number one--so do I want to size down for control?  Give up and buy new trail-running shoes?

Let's say I have this bike, see, and I want to know how to maintain it.  When I rode horses, it was a source of pride how well-kept your horse was.  I did everything.  I'm not so mechanically-inclined.  Actually, I have no idea.  I actually think I could be.  So how do I learn everything I need to know from flats to bar tape and when to call the shop?  I'd ask my husband, but he's already 100 miles up the road...

I like to shop, but my husband always jokes that I can't shop outside of clearance sections.  He's right (don't tell him), so how will I know which equipment is okay to bargain-shop and on which gear I need to spend spend spend?  Is my husband lying when he says the expensive Sidi's in his online shopping cart are better than the brand that was on sale and that he has to pay more for the helmet that matches his kit?  I need to know.

Do I need a license to be this cool?  Are there some events that are just for kicks and some that are for points?  Where should a gal start?  I'm a big joiner!  Just check out the "clubs and activities" section of my old yearbooks.  It would be embarrassing if I wasn't proud.  Oh, and what is the "season?"

I'm...a bit..less fit than I was prior to gestating all my perfect children, so how fit is fit enough?  Is there a routine that's more beneficial than another?  An area to target? (Please don't say core...please don't say core...please don't say core...)  You are going to say core.  I sensed a disturbance in the force.  Okay, so core and what else?  Pilates is the devil so I'm sure I need to do even more of it.  Yoga is like candy, so please tell me I can have more of that.  That's strength and flexibility, what about endurance?  I'm sure you've done well when you feel like your lungs are exiting through your mouth because you were really really pushing yourself, but I want to have enough stamina to make it through the entire race before collapsing, triumphant that I survived.  Smiling, even, because this is wicked amounts of fun.  So what do you suggest?  I'll start right away.

What is the culture like?  Every activity has it's own culture.  I used to ride horses cross-country (alternate universe cyclocross for horses?  Also, how you know I am brave as heck--go watch some videos on YouTube) and there were spoken and unspoken rules and traditions and even ways of showing your individuality within the cultural mores.  So tell me what you know.  These could be my people.

Finally, what is the one thing you wish you knew before you started?  Yeah, I want the secret stuff.

Awaiting your wisdom,

Me.